Friday, March 1, 2013

the importance of having girlfriends

This topic has been on my mind lately, and I was originally going to include it in my Thursday Thoughts but decided against it in favor of dedicating a whole post to it like it deserves.  I always miss my family and friends, but there are definitely days when I miss them extra....and this week has been one of those times.

It got me thinking about how important women are to other women.  As I get older, I understand more and more why maintaining strong friendships with other women is so necessary.  And since I've lived on the other side of the world, I've come to appreciate even more than I already did the time, love, and effort that go into making and keeping strong relationships with the girls in my life.  I love and cherish my husband to the ends of the earth (and if you know me at all, you know this to be true), but there's something undeniable about the bonds between women.

As I think about this, my mom and her girlfriends come to mind.  They are my role models for how to maintain strong female relationships.  Many of them have been friends for decades, and some of them are newer friends who seem like they've been around forever.  Well I've been watching..and learning...and applying it to my own life. 

Here's what I know to be true about the importance of having true, lifelong girlfriends:
.....They are the ones who you can count on to pick you up when you can't do it yourself.
.....They are there for the happiest of days when a new baby is born and for the saddest of days when someone special is no longer here, whether they're taken before the mommy ever got a chance to hold him/her in her arms or if they lived a long, happy life or anywhere in between.
.....They are the people you can make eye contact with and understand what they're saying.
.....They are the ones who moved far away and you don't talk to often enough but can pick right up where you left off the last time you saw each other, even if it has been years.
.....They are the people that give without expecting something in return.
.....They are the people who know what you need when you're not quite sure.
.....They are the ones who you can trust to keep your secrets...and you don't have to remind them to keep it a secret.
.....They are the ones you can vent to, big or small, and won't think less of you.
.....They are the ones who encourage you to go for something new and big in your life, even if it means it'll take you away from them.

I feel so lucky to have the women in my life that I do....young, old, new, mom, and sisters.

These are some quotes I've come across recently that make me smile.  If you're a woman, I hope you can relate to this post.  If you're my mom or her best girlfriends, many of who serve as family to us as well, thank you for showing me what being a good friend means.  If you're my best girlfriends, thank you for being you.  I hope you know I treasure each of you and think about you often.  xoxoxoxoxo
"Friendship isn't about whom you have known the longest... It's about who came and never left your side."

"A real friend is someone who tries to pick you up when you've fallen, and if they can't pick you up, they lay down right beside you."

"It's been said that everlasting friends go long periods of time without speaking and never question the friendship.  These friends pick up like they just spoke yesterday regardless of how long it has been or how far away they live, and they don't hold grudges.  They understand life is busy and love is there."

 "Reminder: Your girlfriends will probably outlive your husband.  So find good ones."

"Even though we change and we're all finding our own place in the world, we all know that when the tears fall or the smile spreads across our face, we'll come to each other because no matter where this crazy world takes us, nothing will ever change so much to the point where we're not still friends."

"A good friend is cheaper than therapy."

"Wishing to be friends is quick work, but friendship is a slow-ripening fruit." 

"Friendship: It's not in the quantity of communications, it's about the quality of the connection."

 "Remember, you don't need a certain number of friends, just a number of friends you can be certain of."


  1. Kristi Gail, this is such a sweet compliment and post. I do cherish my friendships and work very hard at keeping them. From my oldest friend Trudie of 42 years to my newest girlfriends I've met only this year or last...they are all part of who I am and who I choose to be. My favorite quote you wrote was this one... "A real friend is someone who tries to pick you up when you've fallen, and if they can't pick you up, they lay down right beside you." Thank you for loving me like you do. How blessed I am to be able to call my daughter my friend too.

    1. That is such a great quote. I love you, Mom.

  2. Kristi, I love this and I love you! I love the one about friendship is not the quantity of communications but the quality of connection. I sometimes feel like I'm the worse and the quanity and I get upset with myself. Then I look around me and see the absolutely wonderful friends that I have, and remind myself that I'm doing something right. I love that we're not only there for each other but each other's children and grandchildren. Even though I don't reach out enough to you Kristi, I truly think of you and your family often. Again, I love you.

    1. Joyce, You'll always have a special place in my heart, for many reasons. That quote is one of my favorites, because it hits home for me too. Love you too!

    2. Kristi - you get it! Remember, "real friends are people, who upon watching you make a fool out of yourself, don't feel like the job has b=en done permanently." Love you, sweetie. Tina